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Big Small World

by daysdeaf

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1.
Picked you up at seven; you were late o'clock. So I sat counting space between the seconds. Those nights in Toronto, Finally come undone with a bottle full of leisure that cures boredom. Floating moons, we are. Circle life. There's a bruised apple in my chest. A body made of funerals, decay, and rest. We've got lover's antennas, We're a walking stitch breathing carefully now in case it rips. We're so far from where we are, We're the everybody fools leaving everybody scars. Where one comes, one day goes. We're the everybody fools leaving everybody scars. A pile of bottles made of paycheques: Living self-doubt is a constant dance. An escape artist, a rag for the rich, I got words for the wise when life's a bitch.
2.
I've got myself stealing things I don't even need Like a dead watch, a casket: these things exceed. I've got myself on the corner of a dream Of a painter, her brushstroke, and her willingness to bleed. You're standing to close to me It makes me feel uneasy. I've got itchy feet, Man, I must look so fishy. Back then in the chorus of the colour We lost ourselves to one another. Back when our lives were all aflutter We lost ourselves to each other. The simple things get me off my seat, fill my empty. A subtle whisper as you leave is enough to send me, finally get me off to sleep. I've got myself stealing things I don't even need, Like a single shoe, a canvas: these things exceed. I've got myself on the corner of a dream Of a tightrope walker with a daring to exceed.
3.
What World 03:29
They've been watching on my cellphone And they're listening for all I know. This room is bugged and that's for sure, So let me write it down on paper. Then you'll know what I know. Once you do I'll burn it through, Then you'll know what I know. Losing time because they're coming for You and I. "You know we're just doing this to protect you, So stay in this room, these men will get you straight. Trust them. Trust me I won't forget you. Please just listen, we're just trying to help you." Losing time because they're coming for you and I. Do you think I'm telling lies? Sh. Nevemind, the teddy bear has a camera-eye. What world?
4.
I got four dollars in my pocket Pass her by... She's got two diamonds, golden rings Pass me by... And I think; Oh she's got it all. I do a dance, be free, smile wide easily. She looks around, looks at me, looks down, she wants to be free And she thinks; Oh he's got it all. Oh they've got it all.
5.
You take it far, way too far, all tangled up you are. Your prides full-up but they come tooled up when you talk too much. You were taught, taught to never run. Brown boys we never run. Even at a cost - when our paths are crossed. He goes: "Bitch you better come right. Bitch you look like you 'bout to get bite. Like a motha fuck who don't act right. Your pussy ass better have your fuckin game tight. Got you in sight. (Clenched fists as they turn white) Blood out make you see lights. I don't bite but I just might motha fucka" And then they play ball: they brawl until one of them falls. Put their stakes up til one of them shows up with a shank, razor. A blade, a razor. The look in his eyes... The killing game. And then he dies protecting his pride. When his mother cries she dies on the inside. He left his mother to say, "you."
6.
The wind bustles me around, save, As I muscle with waves, And I tussle with graves in the dead middle of the sea. You anchor me. You hold breathless the ocean floor, While sky's violence and wanting more, Tsunami engulfing the shore pulling debris back to the sea. You anchor me. And by a feathered-touch I'm stayed.
7.
My Father is a farmer turned taxi driver; Tilled the fields while ditching class. Then he jumped the ocean as main provider To bless the fam with better plans. My Mother is a Queen and a factory woman; Work til she bleeds out her hands. Done the same old job for some thirty odd years But she blessed the fam with better plans. This is what we are made of: Crossed the ocean was an act of love This is the story of a thousand immigrants; Pulled apart by two cultures and two languages. In the face of racism, got their pride in bandages - In a place with resistance but there are passages for the children. Broken up language and feeling foreign, Twisted emotion with family abroad, Choosing the children before their comfort: Millennial what do we complain about.
8.
If we just live for one another things would be that much better But we just get side-tracked by our own. Like look at my bank account, Look at my fancy car. That's what it's all about, That's what we all live for. Counting all our gods, Counting all our whores, Counting all we've got still we're looking for more. Too many gods. The mighty dollar surely drowns power hungry clowns Climbing ladders as they watch us fall. Like look at my diamond job, Look at my sexy girl. Everyone one I rob, Everything I curl, Everything I've done climbing up this world makes me king of it all. Well I'm sick of it. Too many gods Just wash up and wake up and be who you wanted. Just wash up and wake up and be who you said you were.

credits

released April 17, 2018

Music and Lyrics by Daysdeaf
Produced by Daysdeaf
Co-produced by Taabu
Mixed and Mastered by Taabu
Artwork by Keerat Kaur

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daysdeaf Toronto, Ontario

Some music just stays with you and leaves you deaf for days...

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